Mmmm.... strap on lady lovin'

Well, this is a real quickie... I was just watching some pretty decent strap-on porn and the funniest thought came across my mind (after I orgasmed already). The video was of one girl wearing a strap-on and basically fucking the other girl, either with her tongue, her fingers or the dildo -- it was very one-sided, almost dominatrix-like, but without the submissive role play. I generally don't get off on the idea of only one person doing all the "doing" because it doesn't seem as real to me. But at least with this particular girl, she knew how to use the cock. I've seen quite a few videos where the girl just doesn't know how to move her body with an attachment like that, and the akwardness of it all just ruins the fantasy.

Anyway, the funny thought was this: 100% lesbian sex to me is like being a vegetarian after having lived a carniverous life -- for whatever reasons you chose to stay away from the meat, you still remember what it was like, and you still crave the flavor. So sometimes you might try some imitation meat, just to savour the taste of it. But really, it's just not the same. And that's probably how it would go down with the lesbian lifestyle for me too. I just love cock -- and the touch of the man that's attached -- waaaay too much to let it go completely.

At the same time, I don't think I go for enough lady-lovin' for lots of varying reasons. Honestly, I think it would be more difficult for me to treat a woman as a sexual object, as opposed to how very easy it is for me to do that with men. I'm sure there are plenty of women out there who just want to fuck, with no strings whatsoever, but perhaps I'm too easily suckered into the stereotype that tells a different story. Not to mention, it's SO MUCH harder to even get into a sex-casual conversation with a woman, as opposed to the men I interact with all day long. And to top it off, I know that deep down, I am afraid of branding myself as Lesbian. Issues. Damn I gots issues.

my personal fireworks

I fell asleep thinking about him last night. Drifting thoughts strolling through my heavy mind -- his fingers long and soft, gentle nose stroking my cheek, his unusually sensitive body and its expression of joy in my arms. He was breathing short, tense, pulses of air and moaning quietly as I kissed his stomach. Slender stomach, taut with anticipation, rippling with every chill that my tongue introduced. I loved how he smelled. Sweet, musky, ripe, dark, curly hairs -- as black as my own. I fell asleep to these memories, swaying me gently in the cool breezes of my afterthought.

And when I awoke, there he was again, fresh in my mind. I felt him there, laying in bed with me, my breasts swollen and aching to be touched. How his mouth, in its entirety, moved along my body, clever tongue, curious lips, fitting my flesh like three-dimensional puzzle pieces cut from the same core. Now is when I touch myself -- a morning reminder of what transpired between us. Now is when I re-embody the memory and celebrate once more the incredible beauty that I witnessed and was a participant in creating. I resume the thought that rocked me into slumber. His cock is erect and hard, so engorged that I can lick just the veins. My tongue probes all around his flesh, and I can make out the topography of his abdominal base. He's tasty. Seeing his pleasure drawn all over his face is tasty. I take him into my mouth and he lets out a gasp, and the look on his face tells me he is experiencing a feeling in a category of its own.

Mind wanders to his fingers and how he fucked me with his incredibly agile digits. First he teased me, taking me all along the edges of my desire. He worked me up to want him so purely, swelling in pleasure. He decided when to enter me, when to brush, when to stroke, when to push, when to pull. I was a puppet in his hands, and he -- a master artist. When he fucked me like this, I felt all of his giving. As if in his hands he offered a single gift, and that gift was ecstasy.

Non-chronological image takes me backward in time, irrational leaps and jumps that take me to the places where I found pleasure. I had my lips wrapped around his cock. My ass was in the air. I was dreaming of getting fucked while sucking on his lovely member. I wanted him to see my ass waving around in the air, yearning to be fucked, back arched, lips puffy and tight. Suddenly my fantasy was interrupted as he sat up quickly, and mounted me in a maneuver that can only be described in wrestling terms. God I wanted him so badly. How deeply I ached to feel his cock inside me, that ache is impregnated into the very cells of my flesh. Still, the chills eek across my spine when I think of how his body went from supine to erect in a matter of seconds, and cock in my cunt. Just. Like. That.

And just like that, I was about to cum. Climbing, writhing sensation burning through my fingers, past my pussy lips and tightening, tightening. My god, I'm so close. That's when it hit me -- the way he held me when he took me from behind like that. Around my entire waist, his arm wrapped me in an embrace that felt like a surreal visit into a gel-filled reality. His entire body held me tight as he pumped himself into me. Long, slow, deep strokes, and me tightening, tightening. His entire arm was wrapped around my waist, elbow hugging my ribcage, pulling me into him, making me meet him there, right there in the middle where the earth comes crashing down, where the immense gravity of a black hole takes everything inside. Consumes everything around it. Right there in the middle is where he took me. And right there, I was fucked, I fucked, and there, I came loud and sweet. What a morning!

BeautyEyes, if only you knew... these were the fireworks I was telling you about. If only you knew...

something new

when BeautyEyes let his fingers roam, they explored so much of my body, and in that exploration, I too discovered new delights. I was apprehensive about letting his fingers penetrate because I was wearing an Instead menstrual cup. yes, you can have sex with this thing inside you, and really, there's no difference. however, because his fingers would be probing so deeply, I didn't want him to feel something strange inside of me. thus, the excruciatingly long bouts of clittoral foreplay. his fingers danced a choreography I've never felt, and it wasn't too extreme of a sensation either. normally, I'm extremely sensitive on my clit, but his gentle ways did wonders on my body. two fingers would glide smoothly, one on each side, flanking my tight little clit, moving my skin side to side, back and forth, up and down. his rhythms were perfect, never off beat from what my body was crying for. he was so attuned to my pleasure that it was as if we were one breath. he watched my face for tell-tale signs and listened to my inhalations. he never wavered, and our motions were syncronous with one another. occasionally, he would dip one finger, then maybe two, just barely glancing the inside rim of my very tight pussy. and then back outside, back to the manipulation of my clittoral pleasure. this continued on for well over an hour. of course there was more going on other than his fingers rubbing me, but for this post, I'm focusing on masturbation.

eventually, he wore me down, broke me away from my apprehensions and I let him slip the whole length of his two fingers inside me. as he eased deeper inside, I could hear him whimper, could feel his breath changing pace. could he really be enjoying this as much as me? the way he flitted his fingers against each other and against the walls of my cunt was something else entirely. I could feel my eyes roll to the back of my head, in complete surrender to what BeautyEyes was making me feel. he started pushing harder, deeper, more rhythmically, and I could feel these scratching sensations where he must have been pushing against my G-spot. (mind you, I've never felt this so-called g-spot, until this weekend.) my body responded by pushing back against his palm and now his thumb was playing around with my lips and my clit. I couldn't take it anymore and started really fucking his fingers, my hips grinding down, my body grasping his, tightening down against him. and that's when I felt it -- the heat, the pressure, the building of muscle tension in my hands, my arms, my abdomen, my thighs clenched taking everything inside me. One final scratch on that small hard mound behind my pubic bone, and that was it. I couldn't believe I was cumming all over his hand. Screams tearing out of me, moans released into the air, he brought me to climax for the first time, with only the dexterity of his fingers. incredible.

now that I am home, looking at porn, I'm experimenting with different touches. trying desperately to imitate BeautyEyes, I've learned another part of my sexuality. I've learned quiet discipline -- the kind that creates a build-up so extreme, the kind that takes patience and time. light circles of barely touching fingertip to clit, leave the grinding for another time. it's a sweet kind of pleasure, unlike the gritty, hard palm-fucking to which I'm accustomed. I have BeautyEyes to thank for this. sometimes all it takes is to slow down and recognize subtlety.

Nice Orgasm

Wow, I just had one of the nicest masturbatory orgasms I've had in a while. Sometimes all it takes is a little something new to kick it up a notch. After a bit of blog-surfing and ending up at the brilliant eros, logos, I decided to revisit a site she has on her side bar that I'd been to a while back -- I Feel Myself.

I think my brain goes through an exhilarating-numbing cycle that goes something like this: for fantasies and for porn, I think about the same concept (i.e. force, incest, lesbian, etc.) and it will be for some period of time when that's the only concept I can think of to get me off. And so it goes until finally it loses its edge, and I just can't seem to cum anymore. (Or perhaps I've orgasmed so much that the brain loses its chemical high that is normally induced by orgasm?)

And so it was today that I unexpectedly stumbled once again, across the best masturbation artistry ever found on the internet. Today, I had the divine pleasure of experiencing Bisou and her provocative form as she rubbed herself in such a tantalizing position. You must see it for yourself. I'm not sure how long her video will be offered as a freebie, but if you can view it, then the pleasure will be all yours. She happens to be in my favorite sexual position, the one I cum by the most, be it with another person or by myself. And her special quirk is something that gave me that extra umph! that took me right over the edge. Not to mention, I was touching myself while seated, behind my desk, in my office (at home). This change in position for me also made something of a novel experience (relatively speaking that is) to enhance my pleasure. All very nice.

EDIT: 12:18pm -- okay, so I went back to see Bisou again, and WOW another very nice orgasm. Twice within an hour. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Bisou!!